On music, passions and related fields
By Anna Johannsen
In November, I started what turned out to be, and still is, a very powerful experience; I started as a trainee with a luthier. I have had an interest in instruments for years, and finally plucked up the courage to ask a luthier whom I already know and look up to very much, and he agreed to take me on. My idea was only to be there for a few weeks to learn basic repairs and better handling of instruments. Then I started and very quickly realized this was deeper than I thought; I need to learn as much as possible, and violin making - or actually, repairing more than anything - needs to be a central part of my life in the future. I’m surprised at myself, because this passion blasted out so strongly and suddenly, especially because I thought I already knew what I wanted to do with my life. Re-evaluating yourself when you have just settled into a comfortable picture is confusing, daunting and overwhelming - but also incredibly fascinating when it’s about something you love.
For context, I am finishing my BA in cello this year, having started on modern, but shortly after discovered Baroque cello and historical performance practice and found out this is my thing. In my academy, it is not possible to study historical performance, so I have forged my own way for two years and will now finish my bachelor on the Baroque cello - which I plan to pursue studying afterwards. I have had a lot of positive feedback both from the Academy and my surroundings, and am also certain for myself that this is the right thing for me.
Now comes the confusing part - lutherie has not changed this. I still want to pursue a freelance career as a continuo cellist; I’m grateful to say it’s starting already and I’m so happy about that. The thing is, I know I also want to study and work with violin making and am determined to combine the two.
I am certain this is possible and will be. I can imagine it in 10 years after my official studies - freelancing and working part-time with repairs, maybe independently, maybe in a workshop. But how to get there? What to study first and what would it mean for the other? There are good days and bad days. The good ones where I know I can do this, the bad ones where the thoughts are all “why can’t you focus on doing one thing well?” “How do you think you can do both?” “you’ll never manage” etc. It’s hard when studying music, because you need to put your passion, your heart and soul into the studies and go all in on it, for one - secondly, because this mentality does not start at the academy, but has been there for many years before that - and even then, there’s always a little voice at the back of the head saying “but are you really going to make it?” What does “make it” even mean? The thought alone that one’s life may not need to be 100% performing all the time for it to be a “success” feels almost like treason at first (yes, I’m being dramatic). But who decides, other than me, what is successful in my life? The fact that I - and many others interested in various music-related fields - go through this thought process may be saying more about the mentality of the current music system than about my choices. I think it’s really important that we reflect consciously upon and discuss these questions in order to stay healthy as musicians and as human beings.
I often struggle with thoughts that my peers and friends in both fields would frown upon my doing the other - yet when taking the courage to talk about these things, I have (almost) only encountered interest, enthusiasm and positive feedback. I realize I am very lucky to be in such a supportive and caring environment; it makes a deep impact on me and I would sincerely like to pass on this support, freedom and enthusiasm for the passions of others. I know it will work out. Because at the end of the day, no matter the hurdles, it is what makes me happy. Not in the sense that I am happy all the time, more like that it is the right, true thing for me. And that is why it will work.
This is in part why I write this blog: Let’s normalize following your passions! Whatever they are, musical or not. I do not feel any less of a musician for also wishing to be a luthier, nor less of a luthier (to-be) for also being a musician. I have friends at the academy who are deeply into arts and filmmaking, and I admire them for being able to pursue that while studying for a violin MA. I truly believe the world will be a better place the more people freely may follow their passions and support those of others, without stigma and prejudice. I wish in no way to deny or neglect all the practical issues concerning finances, health, physical and mental and everything that goes into living a life as a musician, but I am certain that letting go of prejudice and expectations of how one “should be” is a big step towards a better future.
More about Anna
My name is Anna Johannsen, I am a Danish/Italian 3rd year Bachelor cello student at the Royal Danish Academy of Music in Copenhagen, and passionate about Baroque music and historical performance practice, and lutherie.
I am active as a freelancing Baroque cellist both in Denmark and abroad - mostly playing continuo, my favourite thing! - I also co-organize a summer course on historical performance “Sommerbarock”, and am a trainee at a luthier’s workshop. If you don’t find me in a continuo group or in the workshop, I’m probably knitting or baking for my friends...
As someone who is looking for other paths than just following the “classical” conservatory, I do think a lot about the music system and the mentality of it, and really appreciate this forum Hattie and Rebecca have created to bring awareness to all these aspects of being a musician.